figuring it out

i feel like i should really have my mother tell this story, as it is hers-- but knowing her and the household that she lives in i feel the need to share it myself.
my mother is crazy. she's definitely my best friend and a huge source of compassion and love. honestly, i don't know what i could have ever done without her. i definitely would not have grown up to be the hippy, sarcastic (whaaa me??) fun loving, roll with what life gives you (when i can... which isn't often because i've usually already planned it...) person that i am. who else would pack up a perfectly good life an move across country to see if you can help out a friend?
that being said, my mother is insane. and recently, she had a spout of the unknown. she was miserable and didn't know her way out. she worked at a job where she hated the people she worked with, she and her boss weren't seeing eye to eye and she was coming home every night miserable and looking for some sort of outlet.
when she found it, the people around her who were used to the normal, fun loving, caring, easy going woman were surprised to find a different sort of crazy. it wasn't fun anymore.
thankfully she lost her job and when she did, she was able to refind herself.
she took her time. she sorted through the things that she really enjoyed in her life and the person she wanted to be. she was completely unemployed for a long time. during this time, she got to catch up with friends, learn new skills, learn reiki, and discover who she really wanted to be. she now has the absolute perfect job. she works with people she likes, that understand her, that don't judge her, that accept her as she is.
that's my mom's story... at least the part told by me.
what i don't understand is.. why should we have to wait to find this? i mean, my mom's not old or anything but it's taken her up until this point to find herself. when am i going to find myself? do i have to wait for something awful to happen? or work years at a job i hate? what is it going to take for me to find me? what i love and what i want to do? and where would i start looking for this? i've been pretty blessed to have "good" jobs my whole life. whether or not i like them. the pay is still ok and they still have benefits... i'm not getting left behind or struggling... but i'm also not doing what i want to do and i've never had the opportunity to figure out what that is. my whole life has been planned to this point.
high school, college, degree. now what?

update: this is what my fabulous aunt carol anne had to say...
Hmmm. That's a tough one. I can say this, though. If you get the mental/emotional/self-esteem/people pleasing/insecure/do I deserve it?/can I do it?/my parents are fucked up (speaking of my OWN personal experience) and fucked me up crap - you are 99.9% on your way there. Clear out the crap. And then tell the world to look out. Because, girl, there is NOTHING you can't do. I'm not just saying that - I mean it. Believe it. You are every bit as smart, funny, clever, charming, endearing, resourceful, intuitive, problem-solving as you (secretly) know yourself to be. Don't hide it. Go for anything and everything you want! I wish I hadn't taken so long to find that out for myself. But I had a lot of baggage. Drop any baggage and take flight!