so apparently my brother being home means everything in life gets more eventful. maybe it's just spending more time than usual with my family.
friday i got out of work early. friday was fancy dinner night. the whole time jake is here we have a schedule of what is supposed to happen. for example, wednesday we went to red hook brewery. it was great. (a three person tour.) friday - fancy dinner. saturday- "shoot 'em up" party. sunday - mom, dad, jake leave for new york. wednesday - jake's supposed to have dinner with april. friday - jake leaves.
jake apparently screwed up the plan. his first royal screw up was that thursday was supposed to be dinner with april. i'm not 100% on what happened but i guess in his drunken stupor on wednesday he asked april if she'd like to come to dinner with the fam on friday. without mentioning this to anyone else. so when he ran it by the rest of the fam (i.e. me and mom) we shot it down. so then he had to explain to april why she couldn't go and from what i gather his explanation had something to do with the fact that mom and i hate her. so when i walked into my parents house on friday and caught him in a fierce texting scenario drinking coors light - my immediate reaction was - we need to get you better beer.
i tried to help. honestly, though i don't care for her, i really don't know her well and was looking forward to attempting to be a better person and hanging out with her on saturday. but i could not tolerate her and my family squished in a car for our hour and a half ride to work. plus i felt like she would be competing for jake's attention and the whole night would be awkward. -- her side of it, from what jake told me, was that he apparently was taking his family's side over hers and it was frustrating to her that he didn't put her ahead of his family. typical girlness. whatever. this isn't even the good part of the night.
so dad was supposed to be home by 4:00; he was home by 5:30 ish. mom was supposed to be home by 5:30 at the latest; she was home a little after 6:00. our journey didn't even start until 7:00. i made it a whole 45 minutes before wanting death to befall myself on the ride. eventually i texted april and said my whole family is nuts. i'm sorry. i hope you can come tomorrow. (she apparently in her anger was not going to come to the shoot out party and wanted us all to have a sit down at a neutral location so we could talk it all out. AND she could only do this while 70% of the family was in new york.)
we got to the restaurant around 8:30. my bed time. by 10, it was clear that not only was i driving we weren't leaving any time soon. so i had coffee. by 12:30 we had more than officially closed down the ENTIRE restaurant. (i'm not even going to get into the absinthe drinking.) so we head on our merry way. me driving my mom's new car which is completely opposite of everything that i'm used to - 2 hours past my normal bedtime. in need of gas.
guess what? at 1:30 in the morning no gas stations are open. that's ok. besides negative nancy (dad) in the backseat, jake completely passed out (did i mention he had texted me at 6:30 in the morning to ask me my feelings about april? yes, he was up at 6:30. why? because he hadn't gone to bed yet.) and mom keeps insisting that her car can make it home on whatever amount of gas we have. so when i went to hit this button that would tell me how much farther we could make it- and the car went into "energy saving mode" and shut down... i pulled into the break down lane. attempted to restart the car. to no avail.
less than 5 minutes later there's a cop behind me. obviously after my explaining to him what happened - he asked if i'd be drinking. (because my cheeks were red. i was like dude. my cheeks are always red.) so it's 1:45 in the morning. i'm out of gas. nearest gas station is 8-10 miles away. my brother is sleep talking. my dad keeps telling me all the things we've done wrong and this is never going to work out. my mom is .. i don't know being my mom. there's a cop asking me if i can call anyone and both mom and i are like - CHAD. i think i attempted to call chad twice, charlie once, but like normal people they were sleeping. oh and i had next to no service. (i'm thinking why can't this cop just go get me a gallon of gas and we'll be on our way? -then again, i'm pretty sure he was probably the only cop on. you'll see why in a minute.) the cop calls chad. i have to explain to him that he's calling a cellphone and therefore chad cannot hear him saying "chad. this is officer so and so. pick up the phone." about 10 or so minutes later chad calls me back. the moment he does- my phone starts beeping that my battery is dying. thankfully the cop is on the other line, tells chad where we are and chad saves me from my murderous rampage. actually. i wasn't really on murder yet although if i was - my dad would have been the first to go. i was contemplating how far i could run before my legs would give out. how long would it take me to walk to alton? probably forever. did i mention i was wearing 4" heels?
so that's the story of how chad saved my life.
did i mention the fact that the cop had to leave us because there was a horse in the highway that he had to go take care of? this is one of those "you know you live in new hampshire when" moments.
oh and how i waited all day the next day (80% sleeping) for erik to finish working on his jeep so we could go to the shoot out. only for him to have his worst day ever: jeep in pieces, parts don't fit, stung by a wasp, 2 hour job going on forever... so when he said he wasn't going. i broke down. i couldn't drive all the way there again by myself. i was an emotional wreck anyhow. he thought i should just stay home. which i did. after calling my brother and then my mom to explain that i couldn't make it. my mom texted me. april is here. crap. i forgot about her. hope she doesn't think i'm not there because i hate her. "please come." my loving husband at this point takes my phone away and calls my mom - tells her we won't be there. sometimes it takes me a really long time to see why he does the things he does. especially because i'm always the person who will do everything because that's what people ask me to do. and that's how marrying my husband was the best decision of my life. and how he saves me from myself all the time.
No comments:
Post a Comment